


Magnus and the Girl Scout.

by RitaMarx



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Gen, It's not what you think so get your mind out of the gutter!, This will really want to make you toss your cookies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-12
Updated: 2016-03-12
Packaged: 2018-05-26 08:09:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6230758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RitaMarx/pseuds/RitaMarx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What can really turn the stomach of a high warlock?  One shot.  Complete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Magnus and the Girl Scout.

**Author's Note:**

> Done with apologies to the Girl Scouts of America. 
> 
> My generic disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don’t own it. If you don’t recognize it, I probably do own it. Not making any $$$ off this.

*********************************************************

Small hand reached up to press the buzzer. 

No response. 

Again, the small hand reached up to press the buzzer. 

Again, no response. 

A third time, the small hand reached up and pressed the buzzer, and leaned on it. It was several seconds before the long awaited answer came. 

“Go Away!” 

For a fourth time small hand reached up and leaned relentlessly on the buzzer. 

“WHO DARES DISTRUB THE HIGH WARLOCK OF BROOKLYN?” 

*********************************************************

Inside the apartment, Magus was having a rough day. His headache was getting worse and worse each and every time the bell buzzed. He had agreed, once again, to help the Shadowhunters and desperately needed peace and quiet to research the current problem. But how in Hell’s name could he get any work done with that incessant doorbell buzzing?! 

Magnus was taken aback when he heard a high-pitched giggle. A sugary sweet voice replied, “You’re funny. Mommy says there are no such things as witches and warlocks.” Another giggle followed. 

“I’m busy. GO AWAY!” 

The buzzer sounded for what seemed like the hundredth time. 

“WHAT do you WANT?” 

“Would you like to buy some cookies?” 

“NO! I DO NOT WANT TO BUY SOME COOKIES!” 

“I’m not going away until you buy some cookies. Everyone else in the building bought some. You’ll ruin my perfect record! Won’t you please buy some cookies?” the honeyed voice pleaded. 

Magnus pounded his head on the wall a few times trying to decide what to turn this persistent pest into. 

Clomping angrily down the stairs, Magnus came down the stairs to the front door of his building. 

He yanked open the door and started, speechless at the pain-in-his-head irritant standing serenely on the stoop. 

He was ready for anything. 

Anything except this. 

He would rather face a horde of ravener demons alone in a dark alley. His heart lurched as it dropped to his stomach, and his stomach dropped to his feet. An icy chill caressed his spine as goose bumps erupted down his body. 

The sun broke through the white, puffy clouds to shine brightly upon his greatest nemesis standing before him. 

Hair of heaven-spun gold shone brightly. Huge, blue eyes the color of the clearest summer day looked up at him from waist high. Rosy cheeks dimpled, framing a mother-of-pearl smile. 

His hands fisted tightly as a cold bead of sweat trickled down the back of his neck. “What will it take to make you Go Away and Never, Ever Darken my doorstep Again?” Magnus inquired through a tightly clenched jaw. 

“Well…” The girl scout turned to wave a hand towards a little red wagon. 

*********************************************************

Alec rapidly drew an Opening rune even before reached the top of the stairs. Bursting through the door, Seraph sword at the ready, his eyes quickly scanned the room for a sign of the enemy who dared attack his love. 

“Magnus! Are you all right?” 

Sprawled across the sofa, Magnus groaned in agony. 

Seeing no threat, Alec rushed over and grabbed a limp hand. “Magnus? You look… Well, you look a bit green around the gills. What happened?”

The High Warlock of Brooklyn weakly swept an arm around to encompass the huge apartment before dropping said appendage heavily across his aching stomach. 

Only then did Alec see crates upon crates stacked from floor to ceiling. Crates of Thin Mints, Samoas, Do-Si-Dos, and every other Girl Scout cookie known to man. Opened boxes and crumpled wrappers were strewn everywhere. Crumbs of all flavors speckled the carpet. 

Magnus moaned, “If I ever see another Girl Scout cookie…” 

In a corner, Chairman Meow mewled weakly as he hacked up a gooey, black blob that smelled faintly of…mint?


End file.
